Reality, My Ass!

I don’t watch much TV anymore.  Mostly, because, even with basic satellite service, and I don’t even know how many channels, there’s hardly anything on that I like.  It’s no mystery as to why.  They tried having programming directed towards guys like me, but it didn’t work out.

It wasn’t because not enough people were watching the shows.  It was because guys like me are cheap, and we don’t buy the products that were advertised, even if we wanted them.  It takes more than viewers to entice companies to advertise their products on TV.  It has to be proven to them that their advertisements will turn viewers into buyers.

My wife buys everything for our family. (Food, clothing, toilet paper, etc.)  I don’t buy much of anything, except from Craigslist and junkyards, so any money spent on advertising directed toward me and other guys like me, is wasted.  Companies that advertise, know this.  They paid a lot of money to find out, and that’s why there is nothing I like on TV.

I don’t even like shows that you’d think I would like (and I thought that I would have liked).  You know, the car building “reality” shows.  I saw the commercials for them, I checked them out, I even gave them a try, but I just couldn’t stand them.  Almost every one is rip off of “American Chopper”, which I used to watch, until I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I really enjoyed watching them build the bikes, but that was only 20% of the show.  Most of it was Paul Sr. and Paulie, bitchin’ at each other, or Mikey doing something stupid.  (You know Mikey, he’s the guy who wears shorts during winter - Automatic tip off that someone’s a doofus.  I might someday, devote an entire post to people who wear shorts in the winter. Oh wait, I already have!)

It must be a good formula for a reality show though, because most of them use it.  It’s always the same.  You got the rich business owner, somehow making money, doing what costs the rest of us money, and put everyone we ever knew personally, that tried to make a living at it, into bankruptcy, and the disrespectful employee(s), who thinks he (they) knows better than the boss.  Now all you have to do is add a retard, and you got a show.

Oh yeah, there’s one other ingredient - the deadline.  The deadline, the deadline, the dreaded deadline!  What a bunch of crap!  Deadline, schmedline!  What difference does it make if Dennis Rodman gets his bike, or his car, or whatever the hell it is that he’s paying way too much money for, two weeks later than expected?  It doesn’t.  If it did, then why the hell did the owner and employees spend so much time goofing off and doing everything but, working on the project for the past three months?

 Now it’s two weeks before the “deadline”, and they have to pull 14 consecutive all-nighters to get it done.  Boy, that’s a formula for some quality workmanship, but we all know that since these things are all filmed in advance, it never actually goes down that way.  If they need more time, they got it, just modify the filming schedule.  No matter when they get the project done, early, on time, or late, they’re always going to say that they got it done, just in the nick of time.

If you record these shows and fast forward through the commercials and bullshit, you can watch everything worth watching, in less than ten minutes.  I want to see the bikes, the cars, the trucks, or whatever, I don’t want to see a bunch of idiots arguing and playing jokes on each other.  I can’t stand that shit, but I bet that the people who can, buy the crap they advertise on the commercials, and that explains - everything.

4 comments:

  1. Hey Neil;

    I do like to watch "Counting Cars, Pawn Stars and American Restoration on the history channel. That is pretty much it for my regular tv watching habits. And Oh yeah...NCIS. All the other stuff on TV don't do anything for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I used to watch all those, plus American Pickers, but because of what I said, I just couldn't stand it anymore.

      Delete
  2. I used to watch all those, plus American Pickers, but because of what I said, I just couldn't stand it anymore.

    ReplyDelete
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