Join My Cult - Send Me Money

You gotta feel sorry for the Jehovah's Witnesses.  They got such a tough sell.  Virtually everyone they visit is either a Christian, happy and comfortable with belonging to whatever church they currently a member of, or someone not interested in religion of any kind.  The Muslims’ job is so much easier - “Become a Muslim or we’ll kill you.”

I always feel sorry for the Jehovah’s Witness children.  No Santa, no Easter Bunny, no birthdays, no trick or treating, no fun. I think this lack of fun that is the major reason that they don’t close more sales.

I think that I might start a cult of my own.  It would be sorta like the Amish, but except for rejecting all technology that came after the horse and buggy days, my cult is going to accept all technology, right up to the muscle car era.  Wouldn’t that be great?  Everyone driving around in Roadrunners, GTO’s and Chevelles, and no cell phones.  I bet I wouldn’t have to stop at anyone’s house to try and get people to join.  They’d be coming to me.  There would probably have to be a waiting list to get in, and I promise, I would only embezzle enough money from the church to make me a millionaire, and no more.  That would be just a drop in the bucket.  No one would care, and then, then I could get going on building all the cars I ever dreamed of.

Maybe I should set up some sort of donation thingy, like other bloggers do.  I’ll call it “What the fuck?  Send a buck.”  I promise you, it would be the best money you ever spent, once you saw all the kick ass shit that I would build.


5 comments:

  1. Man, that brings back memories. Back in High School I got to second base on the racquetball courts with a Jehovah Witness girl. Man she was a sweety. It sucked though, because she was not allowed to go out or even talk on the phone, I guess I was their version of a infidel.
    Where do I send a buck?
    C.J.

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    1. Wouldn't that be cool if a shit load of people wanted to send a buck? It would be the best money they ever spent. The first thing I would build would be this: http://goldengeesenews.blogspot.com/2014/02/my-evil-plan.html
      I would post my progress regularly, maybe have some videos.
      There's so many projects I would like do. Most of them budget builds, that people couldactually afford. I think people would be surprised to see, how inexpensively you can build a car that you wouldn't be embarrassed to be in, on cruise night.

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    2. Or you could spend it on beer.
      C.J.

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    3. I would buy a monkey.
      C.J.

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    4. I had a Monkey, but I spanked it, so the Humane Society took it away from me. I can afford beer, but I can't afford another car.

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